Work from Home: Dream Come True or Fantasy
As I write this I’m sitting in my office. My partner is upstairs with the kids. This is the beginning of the Covid-19 quarantine and I’m totally set up for life to go on mostly as usual. I’ve been working an at home business 50% or more of the time for the last 5 years so there’s very little adjusting for me to do.
For people who are stuck in an office for 40 hours per week (not to mention stuck in cars or trains to get to the office) working from home seems like such a dream. There are several business models that capitalize on that dream, but does it really pan out like that?
When we think of working from home or starting a home business, we obviously think of skipping the commute, leaving behind office drama, hanging out in sweatpants all day, and earning the big bucks in the comfort of your own home.
For parents, there’s also the idea that you could be home working while your kids are home too. Skip paying a babysitter (which is a legit barrier for some households who want to earn more money.) Add in a lot more time with your kids and it seems like a dream come true.
Except it isn’t.
Parenting is a job that requires skill and attention. Your work from home gig (whatever it may be) also requires your skill and attention. One person can’t give skill and attention to two things at once-at least not without doing at least one of them poorly.
Working from home (with kids there too) can include a lot of frustration and guilt. Frustration that you’re not getting as much done as you could be. Guilt that you’re not answering the parenting call as well or as often as you could be. You might be in sweatpants, but it doesn’t always add up to the fantasy you created before you started working from home.
And it can work.
It can work with a few adjustments to expectations and routine. If you’re considering starting an at home business or bringing your office work home, here’s 5 tips I’d suggest for working while kids are home:
-Get in the mindset that you’re working two jobs. Is what you’re doing worth it? As an entrepreneur, the work I do at home leads to bigger and bigger checks so the answer is yes. If you’re making minimum wage or a commission only job with little room for growth, maybe not.
-Identify some key times. Key times are time when another adult can take care of your kid(s) well and consistently. You can’t always count on naps taking the same amount of time each day.
You might be working while a partner gets the kids dressed and fed in the morning or does bedtime. If you do not have a co-parent, can you get a friend or grandparent to commit to coming over for a particular time each day/several times a week? (Be honest about how reliable that person is.) Or if your kids are older, their school hours would be your key times.
-Consider sending them to a sitter/friend/family member. Barter the time if you have to, but get a few half or whole days free when you can work without kids around. Treat these times as sacred (or like other people do when they’re working away from the home.) Don’t schedule a coffee date or run errands during these times although that might be very tempting.
-Have boundaries around what you do when your kids are there. During this quarantine, my kids are here full time and my last 2 pieces of advice don’t apply. So I’ve decided that I do one small thing in the morning and one thing in the afternoon.
I have my kids budget their screen time for when I’m working on these things. I share with them my goal for the day and tell them that I’ll be available to play/read/whatever when I’m finished.
When I’m done, I’m back to being “Mom” rather than “Mom who is trying to do this other shit.” My pace is slower, but I’m also still staying in touch with my children enough to help me feel connected and at the end of a week I have actually made quite a bit of progress.
-Schedule in some downtime. Life is about more than switching from one type of work to another. You need time too. Let yourself see your friends, go out to dinner, spend time with a significant other. (Or video chat with a friend, play online games, meditate, whatever you do for self care during quarantine.) You’ll be able to stick to a consistent routine if you have the ability to refill your cup.
Consider if these things will work before you commit to a work from home gig. The reality of working from home might look different than what you dreamed, but it can work really well. If you have someone to guide you then your success is even better.
I help people learn how to work from home with a business centered around using essential oils. If you want to see if this could be right for you then give me a shout out.